I love the new year. I love the idea of starting fresh, of looking at things with a new perspective. I also love making new year's resolutions. They make me feel like I am somehow moving forward, help me to think that I am making progress in some small ways in my life.
For the past two years, I have made the resolution to stop hitting snooze on my alarm clock. The first year, I think I made it about a month, and then it was downhill from there. Last year, I actually made it to July...pretty good for anyone, I'd say, but then something happened in August, I missed one day and I feel off the wagon.
So this year, I am going to do it once again! And hopefully I can make it for the whole year...I think I might have a chance!
I am making some more serious resolutions this year as well, but those will have to be saved for a later post.
Happy New Year!
Friday, January 02, 2009
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Liturgy
I love my church. I realize that I have said this many times before, and I am continuously surprised that I continue to say it. Not that I don't want to love the place where I worship, I am just surprised that the honeymoon period has not ended. What is it about worshipping at City Presbyterian Church that stirs something in my soul unlike any of the other experiences I have on a weekly basis?
I work at a small Christian university. The majority of my time is spent surrounded by other people who believe simlarly to me, by people who are encouraging me to be involved in small groups, to talk about my faith, to grow deeper in my faith. I love Christian higher education because it gives me the opportunity to provide a place for students to expore, doubt, ask tough questions in an environment that is safe, an environment that will help catch them if the feel like they are falling. Students, faculty and staff attend chapel twice a week to hear from local pastors, to engage in contemporary worship music, to be challenged to serve in different capacities throughout the city and the world. I am encouraged as a part of my job to mentor students, to disciple them in their own faith.
And yet, in the midst of all of this Christianity, it seems like I am missing something. I have become so used to "knowing" the right answers, saying the right "Christianese" that my daily life at work has become ritualistic. I go about doing all of these great Christian things on auto-pilot. I feel distant from the very meaning of the work that I love and do.
Ironically, I think that part of the distinction for me between these two faithful activities, attending church and working at a Christian university, is found in liturgy. Ironic, because liturgy is often described as empty and meaningless, that the ritual of saying the same things over and over every Sunday move people away from genuine faith instead of toward it.
Liturgy is an important part of the worship at City Presbyterian Church: "It points us to worship as an act rather than as an experience. The experience comes as a result of the act, for we have come to do something (worship) and the blessings we receive are in response to what we have given." (City Presbyterian Website). So, what exactly does this mean? In my short and very limited research on the topic of liturgy, I have discovered a few commonalities. Liturgy allows us to connect to our own faith through history, liturgy allows for active participation in worship, and liturgy provides a basic structure for our worship. And I think this is a big part as to why my church has been feeding my soul, and continues to feed my soul, even after a year of attending.
Some Sundays, I sit with a big dumb grin on my face when the preacher says, "and let us join with people around the world as we say together..." I love that we recognize that we are not starting something new when we gather together on Sundays. When we work together through different passages, read different creeds, sing hymns written in the 1600s, it makes what I believe that much more real. It reminds me that I am not walking alone, but that others have gone before me, and I can join with them even across time.
Liturgy also allows for participation through the service. This is often when people say that liturgy leads to meaningless ritual. Because we just stand up, and sit down, and repeat what we are being told. The difference here for me, is that the words that I am being called to repeat, the lyrics to the hymns that we sing go so much deeper that I cannot help but participate. I cannot say the words that are not the common "Christianese" and not hear what I am saying. They are refreshing and new, and take me to a place that is much deeper.
The order of worship has been powerful for me too. The structure reminds me the importance of things like confession in my life. Every week, I get to the confession part of our service and I am reminded once again of my deep need for Jesus. And in my busy week, even as filled as it is with good "works", I do not stop long enough to remember to sit silently and humbly before God, recognizing my own depravity. And every week, I have the opportunity to reflect on the death of Christ, through the sacrament of bread and wine. I don't know that I would spend a typical day going to these depths. It is the community of this church that helps me to get to that place.
Liturgy, literally means "the work of the people". And maybe I am beginning to understand the power of that good work. That as a community of people, we are able to meet Jesus in a deep and significant way because of the intentional and common bond we find in our rituals.
I work at a small Christian university. The majority of my time is spent surrounded by other people who believe simlarly to me, by people who are encouraging me to be involved in small groups, to talk about my faith, to grow deeper in my faith. I love Christian higher education because it gives me the opportunity to provide a place for students to expore, doubt, ask tough questions in an environment that is safe, an environment that will help catch them if the feel like they are falling. Students, faculty and staff attend chapel twice a week to hear from local pastors, to engage in contemporary worship music, to be challenged to serve in different capacities throughout the city and the world. I am encouraged as a part of my job to mentor students, to disciple them in their own faith.
And yet, in the midst of all of this Christianity, it seems like I am missing something. I have become so used to "knowing" the right answers, saying the right "Christianese" that my daily life at work has become ritualistic. I go about doing all of these great Christian things on auto-pilot. I feel distant from the very meaning of the work that I love and do.
Ironically, I think that part of the distinction for me between these two faithful activities, attending church and working at a Christian university, is found in liturgy. Ironic, because liturgy is often described as empty and meaningless, that the ritual of saying the same things over and over every Sunday move people away from genuine faith instead of toward it.
Liturgy is an important part of the worship at City Presbyterian Church: "It points us to worship as an act rather than as an experience. The experience comes as a result of the act, for we have come to do something (worship) and the blessings we receive are in response to what we have given." (City Presbyterian Website). So, what exactly does this mean? In my short and very limited research on the topic of liturgy, I have discovered a few commonalities. Liturgy allows us to connect to our own faith through history, liturgy allows for active participation in worship, and liturgy provides a basic structure for our worship. And I think this is a big part as to why my church has been feeding my soul, and continues to feed my soul, even after a year of attending.
Some Sundays, I sit with a big dumb grin on my face when the preacher says, "and let us join with people around the world as we say together..." I love that we recognize that we are not starting something new when we gather together on Sundays. When we work together through different passages, read different creeds, sing hymns written in the 1600s, it makes what I believe that much more real. It reminds me that I am not walking alone, but that others have gone before me, and I can join with them even across time.
Liturgy also allows for participation through the service. This is often when people say that liturgy leads to meaningless ritual. Because we just stand up, and sit down, and repeat what we are being told. The difference here for me, is that the words that I am being called to repeat, the lyrics to the hymns that we sing go so much deeper that I cannot help but participate. I cannot say the words that are not the common "Christianese" and not hear what I am saying. They are refreshing and new, and take me to a place that is much deeper.
The order of worship has been powerful for me too. The structure reminds me the importance of things like confession in my life. Every week, I get to the confession part of our service and I am reminded once again of my deep need for Jesus. And in my busy week, even as filled as it is with good "works", I do not stop long enough to remember to sit silently and humbly before God, recognizing my own depravity. And every week, I have the opportunity to reflect on the death of Christ, through the sacrament of bread and wine. I don't know that I would spend a typical day going to these depths. It is the community of this church that helps me to get to that place.
Liturgy, literally means "the work of the people". And maybe I am beginning to understand the power of that good work. That as a community of people, we are able to meet Jesus in a deep and significant way because of the intentional and common bond we find in our rituals.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Monday, August 04, 2008
Service Reflection
I had the opportunity to write something for a service reflection journal at Baylor, so I thought I'd share part of it here:
Losing Control
Losing Control
I have a love-hate relationship with service projects.
There is nothing that I love more than helping other people engage in meaningful service. I cannot think of anything better than watching new college students experience the uncomfortable reality of interacting with someone who looks so unlike them. I cannot help but smile when I think about the significant ways that service not only meets a specific need in a community, but also the impact it has on the individual doing it. In my opinion, there is no better way to bring a group or team together, then by serving.
But I hate the details of coming up with the right project. I hate organizing service so that people have enough to do, and trying to figure out how to get supplies, donations, tools, and some sense of purpose defined for the project. And my stress level only increases as the number of participants in the service project goes up.
I think I am missing the point here. Should planning a service project really be this difficult? Is this really the intent for why I think service matters?
The problem here is me. My perspective is off. Service projects can be difficult to organize, tedious to coordinate, seem like just another task to mark off my list. But, the motivation that pushes me to plan and serve should not be about finding the ideal project. It should not be about making things work out perfectly so that those who are involved are not hassled, are not uncomfortable, that they do not experience any sort of aggravation in joining in on the service.
Service is not only about action; service is about surrender. Surrender for those who are participants, but more so, surrender to those of us who plan these projects for others. It is releasing the idea that we need to have every box checked, and every detail planned in order for the day to be a success. Some of the most beautiful interactions happen as students are thrown into an uncomfortable place where they are required to take initiative, be creative, and ultimately serve in a way that is really utilizing their gifts.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Summer of Fun!
I am so excited about a summer in Colorado! So, in order to fully enjoy it, I have been inspired by a few people to create a list of things to do (on a smaller budget) in Colorado. If you have any suggestions...please send them my way! And, if you are in the area and want to join in on any of these adventures, then let's do it!
Backpacking in Rocky Mountain National Park
Hike some fourteeners (Bierstadt is the first on the list)
Camping
Watch a movie at "Film on the Rocks" : Red Rocks Ampitheatre
Visit the Zoo
First Friday Art Walk
Run the Bolder Boulder, May 26th
Volunteer for a Habitat Build
BBQs in the park
Boating/Waterskiing
Rock Climbing
Float through Steamboat Springs
Alpine Slide at Heritage Square
Ultimate Frisbee
Any other suggestions/ideas?
Backpacking in Rocky Mountain National Park
Hike some fourteeners (Bierstadt is the first on the list)
Camping
Watch a movie at "Film on the Rocks" : Red Rocks Ampitheatre
Visit the Zoo
First Friday Art Walk
Run the Bolder Boulder, May 26th
Volunteer for a Habitat Build
BBQs in the park
Boating/Waterskiing
Rock Climbing
Float through Steamboat Springs
Alpine Slide at Heritage Square
Ultimate Frisbee
Any other suggestions/ideas?
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Spring Break to Minnesota
I took a road trip to Minnesota with some of my family for spring break. We went to help celebrate my grandma's 101st birthday! Here are some fun pics from the trip (and I'll try and get a video posted too!):
The Corn Palace:
There really isn't anything better to do on a road trip through Nebraska then to stop at the ONLY CORN PALACE in the world! (I know, I couldn't believe it either!)
That's right, they change it every year, and it is all made of corn!
Wow...12 different colors!?!?
I couldn't believe it either.
I also couldn't believe that the mascot for the town's high school was the kernals...really? Yes!
Grandma Cora's 101st Birthday!
Grandma's three girls!
She was singin' along with some old hymns on the violin!
Stayin' active!
A pretty incredible woman! She is doing so great for 101!
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Cori and Kris's Wedding
Here are some pics from Cori and Kris's Wedding:
Beautiful Bride!
Breakin' it down on the dance floor
Catchin' up with old friends:
Courtney-roomie from Baylor
Matt-Good friend from Parker
Erin-friend from PEPC
Casey-Friend from high school-brother of the bride
Randy...this one is for you. Can you guess who I sat with to have this pad of butter end up on the ceiling!?!?!
I'm not too coordinated on the dance floor...
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Saturday, December 01, 2007
Denver's Parade of Lights
I went to Denver's Parade of Lights last night...nothing like freezing cold weather, high school marching bands, a hot cup of hot chocolate, large inflatable penguins, and pooper scoopers to put you in the Christmas spirit!
Libby and I were scared of something here...maybe the Grinch?
Eric is practicing to be in the parade for next year...
Nate and Libby...in front of the float with Baby Jesus!
HARK!!!
Apparently I thought this was the parade for the fourth of July and I needed to say the pledge of allegiance...weird
This is the back of the inflatable penguin, yeah, we're still excited!
And of course...SANTA!
Monday, November 19, 2007
Tag, I'm It!
I am playing a game with my friend Tiffani. (You can check out her blog by clicking "Tiffani's Blog" on the link to the right). The game is to write seven things that you may, or may not know about me...so here it goes...
1. I hate it when people take forever to find a parking spot. I prefer to just find a spot, no matter where it is, instead of driving up and down each of the aisles like a hundred times...sheesh (this especially becomes irritating to me during the holiday season.)
2. I don't ever listen to a CD all the way through. I listen to one song, (maybe more if I really like the artist) and then take out the CD to find a new one. This has become a bit of a problem today, because my CD player in my car will not eject the CD. I am now forever listening to Mat Kearney and Over the Rhine.
3. I really love animals, and wish that I could have a dog. If I could choose any type of dog, it would most definitely be a chocolate lab. I am still thinking about names, and am open to suggestions. :)
4. When I was a freshman in college, I had to come up with a list of 25 things I wanted to do before I died. I thought I was just being funny when I wrote this at the time, but I said that I want to be someone who dances upon injustice (from the Delirious song). I think it is interesting that that is the only one of the 25 I still remember...I still want to be someone who dances upon injustice.
5. I get giddy about the church I go to. It's like I wake up on Sunday morning and can't wait to get there. (Sometimes I even have a hard time going to sleep...I get so excited) I love the community, the pastor, the people I go with, the tradition, the location, the liturgy.
6. I love music and lyrics. My favorite song right now is the hymn "Come Though Fount of Every Blessing". I love the line that says, "Prone to wonder, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love. Here's my heart, Oh take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above."
7. When I was little, and someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I told them I wanted to be the voice of a cartoon.
So there you go...(Thanks for the game Tif!)
Tag, you are it:
Lissa and Nate
Sarah and Jeff K.
Eric T.
Katie and Cameron B.
Amy R.
1. I hate it when people take forever to find a parking spot. I prefer to just find a spot, no matter where it is, instead of driving up and down each of the aisles like a hundred times...sheesh (this especially becomes irritating to me during the holiday season.)
2. I don't ever listen to a CD all the way through. I listen to one song, (maybe more if I really like the artist) and then take out the CD to find a new one. This has become a bit of a problem today, because my CD player in my car will not eject the CD. I am now forever listening to Mat Kearney and Over the Rhine.
3. I really love animals, and wish that I could have a dog. If I could choose any type of dog, it would most definitely be a chocolate lab. I am still thinking about names, and am open to suggestions. :)
4. When I was a freshman in college, I had to come up with a list of 25 things I wanted to do before I died. I thought I was just being funny when I wrote this at the time, but I said that I want to be someone who dances upon injustice (from the Delirious song). I think it is interesting that that is the only one of the 25 I still remember...I still want to be someone who dances upon injustice.
5. I get giddy about the church I go to. It's like I wake up on Sunday morning and can't wait to get there. (Sometimes I even have a hard time going to sleep...I get so excited) I love the community, the pastor, the people I go with, the tradition, the location, the liturgy.
6. I love music and lyrics. My favorite song right now is the hymn "Come Though Fount of Every Blessing". I love the line that says, "Prone to wonder, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love. Here's my heart, Oh take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above."
7. When I was little, and someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I told them I wanted to be the voice of a cartoon.
So there you go...(Thanks for the game Tif!)
Tag, you are it:
Lissa and Nate
Sarah and Jeff K.
Eric T.
Katie and Cameron B.
Amy R.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Shoot the bear
A beautiful mountain setting, a perfect spring day. A crystal blue mountain lake sits in a quiet valley surrounded by towering peaks just tipped with snow. Alone in the middle of the lake is an old wooden boat with a small girl inside, lying down, soaking in the beauty and goodness of God, her hand in the water leaving a slight ripple, the only movement in the silent waters.
But suddenly the calm is broken, as someone comes running into the scene, a wild bear chasing after her. The girl sitting up, realizes that with the quick movement and a few swift rows with her oar, could save the life of this stranger. She could move to the rescue, the girl could jump in the boat and be saved. But as she picks up the oars, she realizes that she cannot stir the water, she cannot put the oar in the water, she selfishly doesn't want to interrupt her peace and quiet.
I am a peacemaker. I love it when people can find common ground. I like it when things are harmonious. Conflict leaves me feeling sick inside, unable to sleep, and overall just uncomfortable.
But this is my fear. That I am too afraid to stir the waters, to take a stand, to shout, to make a movement. Not even that I need to be rescuing anyone. But is peace always the best solution? Can a win-win situation really be created all the time, or is that just a person without passion, without a spine?
I mean really, in the end, the girl and the bear will come barreling into the water anyway, the waters will be disturbed, or the bear will prevail.
Take a stand, be angry, do something more than think or be afraid. Take action. Create conflict.
Shoot the bear.
But suddenly the calm is broken, as someone comes running into the scene, a wild bear chasing after her. The girl sitting up, realizes that with the quick movement and a few swift rows with her oar, could save the life of this stranger. She could move to the rescue, the girl could jump in the boat and be saved. But as she picks up the oars, she realizes that she cannot stir the water, she cannot put the oar in the water, she selfishly doesn't want to interrupt her peace and quiet.
I am a peacemaker. I love it when people can find common ground. I like it when things are harmonious. Conflict leaves me feeling sick inside, unable to sleep, and overall just uncomfortable.
But this is my fear. That I am too afraid to stir the waters, to take a stand, to shout, to make a movement. Not even that I need to be rescuing anyone. But is peace always the best solution? Can a win-win situation really be created all the time, or is that just a person without passion, without a spine?
I mean really, in the end, the girl and the bear will come barreling into the water anyway, the waters will be disturbed, or the bear will prevail.
Take a stand, be angry, do something more than think or be afraid. Take action. Create conflict.
Shoot the bear.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
For the love of Colorado
Here is yet another reason to love Colorado...
...it is November and we are hiking at an amazing place like Rocksborough State Park...
...practicing Pilates in the middle of the wilderness (well, okay, I guess the manmade deck we are standing on indicates that we are not really in the middle of the "wilderness", and clearly we are not really practicing Pilates)...
...practicing our best looks for the runway, or to be able to really intimidate our students...
...meeting the locals (like Bambi)...
...it is November and we are hiking at an amazing place like Rocksborough State Park...
...practicing Pilates in the middle of the wilderness (well, okay, I guess the manmade deck we are standing on indicates that we are not really in the middle of the "wilderness", and clearly we are not really practicing Pilates)...
...practicing our best looks for the runway, or to be able to really intimidate our students...
...meeting the locals (like Bambi)...
...without the architecture, we have to recreate the gargoyles found on buildings...
...did I mention it is November and this is what we are doing! :)
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Life in the LDC-that's Life Directions Center
Some fun pictures from my life at CCU!
Libby and I enjoy a quick break! She is pretty much amazing!
Libby and I enjoy a quick break! She is pretty much amazing!
Cheek to cheek!
A typical day in the cubicle!
Stephen is my partner in crime in advising the freshman class!
Libby and Eric, fellow advisors!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
